Miscarriage: Who Said Starting a Family is all fun and games?

Thanks for checking out the blog! In this post I wanted to share my experience on a topic that is taboo and often not discussed frequently enough. Miscarriages. First of all they suck and they are hard as hell on both parents.

There is few pains in life that beat losing a child, although miscarriages are unborn children ask any parent, once you know they exist you see them, you feel them, you love them! There are many coping mechanisms, some put shells and hide it, but it is true and it is there, I wish I faced it earlier.

“Life is tough, my darling, but so are you.” —Stephanie Bennett-Henry

https://www.mother.ly/child/29-inspiring-quotes-to-remember-when-trying-to-conceive

I remember when I found out my wife was pregnant, it was exciting, confusing, and stressful! First of all buy good tests if you are trying, nothing more frustrating than trying to determine the results from a cheap test, I suggest: https://www.clearblue.com/pregnancy-tests. (No, not getting paid, just from experience).

Another stressor, the whole trying to get pregnant thing… I love how movies make that every ounce fun and romantic, sometimes it can feel like work. Once we knew she was pregnant it was a sigh of relief the trying the timing and then it hits, oh wow it’s real, I am going to be a father!

So here I was getting accustomed to the fact that my life is changing, my wife has a tiny human starting to grow, we started researching doctors, trying to get an appointment, finally get one. Here we go about to go to the doctor. Then all of a sudden my wife doesn’t feel well, her stomach has pain and she has to go to the bathroom, oh here is morning sickness, but afterwards her face is pure sadness and pain.

It hits me, everything I had just built up and experienced is gone, and your wife is in pain and you have to be strong. That was the emotion I felt, I still get goosebumps, it took me months to really truly come at grips with the loss. I wanted to be there for my wife, she was in pain and she had been the one to experience it physically.

After we realized it, and had confirmed with the doctor we went and had drinks and mexican food. We discussed the sadness, the reality and agreed we’d discuss “the next time” later. It was hard and it really made me realize how taboo of a subject miscarriage is.

I learned a lot of people go through this, but no one discusses it. I searched online, looked at statistics and saw that it was a common problem couple face. So for whoever needs this, I am here for you if need help or just want to vent, I understand, I have been there.

I learned it is okay to feel pain, talk about it, celebrate the baby and remember them with your future children. It helped me, I hope this helps you.

Until next time, thanks for visiting.